My dad

I have written about my dad in this space a few times before. On July twenty-second, he left this world to join my mom who went to heaven six and a half years ago. Dad was 103 years old. He had lived an amazing life. He was devoted to God, to his wife, and to his family. He and Mom had eight children, over thirty grandchildren (my sister knows the exact number) and many more great grandchildren. These two people had over one hundred descendants. My dad was a good example to the next generations. That he was much loved was clearly evident when all of his children with their spouses, nearly all of his grandchildren, and many of his great grandchildren showed up for his funeral in Northern Michigan. One grandchild flew in from California for a day, another was there from Switzerland, another also came from California but stayed several days. Others came from Minnesota, Vermont, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Rhode Island and New York.

There is a sadness about dying at such an age. None of his friends came, none of his beloved in-laws came, and no one from his generation was able to make it. They had all already passed. That part was sad. He was the last of his generation in our family to go. Now it is up to my generation. There is also a gladness about it, gladness that he is going to be with them.

He was born in Detroit in 1921. His dad died when he was two, just after his baby brother was born with intellectual limitations. Dad was such a responsible person for both his mother, brother, and then us all of his life. After his dad died, his British (and increasingly deaf) mother took her two children back to England. She came back to the US a few years later when her sister, who lived near Detroit, begged her. When he was ten, during the hard years of the depression, his mother sent him to live with her sister and brother-in-law for one year, and there he attended a one room country schoolhouse where my mother also just happened to be in the same grade. During that year, he formed a close friendship with Mom’s brothers that continued throughout his life. His mother remarried and his stepfather taught him to repair automobiles, a skill he used to repair our vehicles for many, many years. When he was about 19, while he was visiting his aunt and uncle, Mom’s mother contrived a plot to get those two together. It worked. After high school, he joined the army before Pearl Harbor. Of course, that changed everything. He and Mom quickly got married in May of 1942 just before he was sent overseas. His education in Detroit schools had prepared him to do secretarial type work and so he worked in various positions in the signal corps during the war.

After the war came the 50’s, family, a job at GMC, home ownership, financial difficulties with his growing family (eight children!) and more responsibilities with his deaf and eventually once again widowed mother and his brother. My point with all of this is that he had a lot to deal with in his life, but he always went through it with grace and kindness. He had a lot of high points in life as well, but went through some times of intense struggle, especially concerning his brother.

In the end, he overcame so much in his life. I am deeply grateful for his example in the lives of all those in our family, especially for the younger generation. In his later years, he was completely attentive to my mother as she struggled through dementia and osteoporosis. He became innocent as a child, but not childish. He would sometimes say, “I love you. You love me. We all love each other, and that’s all we have to do.” When I saw him in January, he woke up from a nap and said, “My wife in heaven is happy, and pretty soon I will be with her and we will be happy together.” Five days before he passed, he was talking on a video call with two of his granddaughters. He said, “It’s going to happen soon. This time my journey is going to be short.” He talked about seeing a beautiful light and said, “It’s a miracle!”

So, God be with you, Dad. Thank you so much for being who you are. It has helped so many of us to know and love God. The time we have here on earth is such a blessing. From your life, it is clear that time is a blessing and the difficulties in life are meant to help us overcome and get closer to our Father in heaven. Living the truth helps us to overcome the hurdles that we all must experience. I’m very grateful that you were able to live such a long and fruitful life and be a witness that love conquers all and that God and heaven are beautiful and worthy rewards for a life well lived. Love you, Dad.

Does God have pain? If so, can we stop His pain?

Pain is a part of life here on earth.  We all know it in different degrees, but how can a person be relieved when the pain is severe?  Pain can be debilitating and all-consuming.  Those experiencing it search for answers in every possible avenue, from conventional medicine to alternative therapies.  Sometimes there is relief, sometimes not.  Watching a loved one in pain is also difficult and leads to feelings of helplessness.  As Christians, of course we pray for healing, but sometimes God our Father allows the pain to continue.

Has our own pain, or seeing a loved one in pain, ever brought us to considering that God could have pain?  Perhaps.  Consider these ideas.  Imagine you have children who make poor decisions.  Perhaps it started in childhood with anger over apparent injustices or hurts.  It can spiral downward and turn to increasingly poor choices and behavior.  God forbid it should continue, but it could.  You would feel a spiritual pain concerning your child’s choices.  Now, let’s take a minute to look at the actual history of mankind.  Created in perfect beauty and harmony, placed in a paradisiacal environment, and given one apparently simple instruction: you can eat from any of these trees except from that tree called the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

We all know the story, even those of us who don’t frequent church settings.  One couple made a poor choice and it’s been downhill every since.  Sure, there have been some upswings, especially when Jesus came into the world.  Imagine our world if Jesus had not come.  We would have all continued that downward spiral with no hindrances.  God our Father tried to spare us.  He really did, and He continues to do so constantly.  That is His constant desire and effort.  So, what about His pain at seeing His own creation, made in His image, both humankind and His paradise world, in such a state as we find ourselves now?

That must hurt.  What would relief from His pain look like?  He is only and always good and only and always wants good for His children.  So, relief from his pain would have to come from us, His children, stopping our sins, turning our lives around so that we could feel comfortable chatting with our dad and having Him feel comfortable with us.

How do we do that?  Read the words of Jesus.  Carry on his legacy.  He gave commandments to his disciples.  We can search out those commandments and make them part of our lives.  Seek Him and He shall be found of you.  (Jeremiah 29:13)  Jesus’ commandments to his friends and disciples are easy to find in a Bible with his words in red print.  Some of them are found in Matthew chapter five.  He expounded on them and demonstrated how to live by them throughout his life.  He himself summarized them:

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Matthew 22:37 – 40

So … can we stop God’s pain?  Yes, we can.  We can stop sinning and turn to God.  Let’s pray that America, indeed our world, and we all learn to stop sinning.

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